Spiritual Gifts FAQs #10
Q: What do I do if I have no idea what my gifts are—and feel like a failure? I once desired the gift of giving—that didn’t pan out like I hoped; I taught Sunday School for a season; and I felt drawn to work with children. None of those worked out for me for one reason or another.
A: First of all, God views us through His lenses—and you are not a failure. Psalm 139 makes it clear that you are “fearfully and wonderfully made” by the God of the universe. Ephesians 2:10 calls us God’s “handiwork”, His “masterpiece.” And, much of Scripture talks about God being most effective in and through us when we are at our weakest. In fact, the Apostle Paul “boasts” in his weaknesses, knowing that Christ’s power will be the thing that not only gets him through but that Jesus will get the credit and the glory for any accomplishments: 2 Corinthians 12:9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.
It is important to also acknowledge that difficult seasons can create a lot of noise for us in hearing God’s calling and purpose. In those moments, we may need to step away from a ministry in order to find support and healing elsewhere. That may be some of what you’ve experienced. It can help to have others around us who can assist and encourage us as we take new steps forward after what feels like failure. Others seeing and calling out your gifts while you are being loved and listened to can be powerful.
In your examples, you may have tried to see if you had the gift of teaching or shepherding by your engagement with Sunday School and with children. We do learn much from trial and error when it comes to gifts. Perhaps, in the trying, you discovered that you did not have gifts of teaching and shepherding. Hopefully, that then points you in a new direction—discovering gifts you do have.
You also mention desiring the gift of giving—perhaps hoping to be in a position to be more generous. We can certainly desire gifts, but Scripture tells us that the Lord gives us the gifts HE wants us to have—not those we want. Many times, we are so distracted by our disappointment over a gift we’re not given that we fail to develop and use those we have been given.
It’s also quite possible that your gifts have changed from one season to the next. Ones you may have had and used are no longer the ones that God intends you to continue to use. Think of the example of the Apostle Paul—when in his missionary journeys of church-planting vs. later in life when under house arrest. It seems to me that his gifts shift from one season to the next—based on what God desires Paul do and on Paul’s changing life circumstances. Paul goes from exhibiting apostleship, evangelism, leadership, and teaching on his travels to then using gifts like artistic expression, shepherding, and likely still teaching—as his ministry become letter-writing to established congregations. I think that’s true for us. Perhaps in this season of your life, you have quite different gifts to be developed than in previous years?
Remember that everywhere you show up, you have the fabulous, God-directed and empowered, potential to shine His gifts on others. One day at a time. One moment at a time.
(For more on gifts, check out the Resources page at GodGiftsYou.com. Take the free assessment and see what gifts God has bestowed on you to contribute to the whole.)
Shirley Giles Davis, author of the God. Gifts. You. Your Unique Calling and Design workbook, Your Unique Design Class Guide, Your Unique Design Facilitator Guide, and Gifts-Calling-Purpose blog, is a consultant, coach, facilitator who has worked with faith-based organizations, nonprofit agencies, and leaders in a diversity of fields for over 30 years. She has also been Equipping Ministries Director at her 1,200 member church since 1999.
Photo (c) Shirley Giles Davis, all rights reserved.